What Are the Steps to Get Joint Custody in Mecklenburg County?

When parents separate or divorce in North Carolina, one of the most important decisions they face is how to share the care and decision-making for their children. Joint custody is one option—and it can take different forms. In North Carolina, “custody” covers two main areas:

• Legal custody: the right to make important decisions about the child’s upbringing, such as education, medical care, and religious training.
• Physical custody: where the child lives and the day-to-day care arrangements.

Joint custody can mean both parents share legal custody, physical custody, or both. It doesn’t always mean a perfect 50/50 split of time—courts may approve arrangements that give each parent significant involvement while still considering work schedules, school locations, and the child’s needs.

That “best interests of the child” standard is at the heart of every custody case in Mecklenburg County. Judges consider many factors, such as the child’s age, health, school performance, and relationships with each parent. The focus is not on what’s easiest for the adults, but on what arrangement will promote the child’s happiness, safety, and healthy development. If both parents can communicate and cooperate effectively, joint custody can be a solution that balances shared responsibility with the child’s overall well-being.

Step 1: Determine Eligibility and Goals

Before you jump into paperwork, take a clear-eyed look at whether joint custody is realistic for your family right now. Courts in North Carolina decide custody based on the best interests of the child, not what’s most convenient for either parent. That means the plan you propose has to work for your child first. 

Ask yourself:

• Can we both meet the child’s day-to-day needs? Think school start times, homework routines, medical appointments, therapies, and extracurriculars.
• Do our work schedules support a shared plan? Rotating shifts, frequent travel, or unpredictable hours may call for creative scheduling (or a joint legal/primary physical split).
• How well do we communicate? Judges look for parents who can share information and make decisions without constant conflict—especially if you’re seeking joint legal custody.
• What’s the distance between homes? Long commutes can strain weekday exchanges and school logistics; proximity often supports more frequent parenting time.
• Is the plan truly in the child’s best interests? Frame every request around your child’s stability, safety, schooling, and relationships—not around adult preferences. 

Practical prep that helps:

• Keep a simple parenting log of pickups, activities, appointments, and communications.
• Sketch a proposed schedule that fits your child’s school calendar and your actual work hours.
• Use a co-parenting app if day-to-day communication tends to go sideways—judges appreciate tools that reduce conflict.

Step 2: File a Custody Action in Mecklenburg County

Which court handles custody?
Custody cases in Charlotte are filed in the Mecklenburg County District Court (26th Judicial District), Family Court division. If you’re starting fresh, you file a custody complaint. If there’s already a court order, you file a motion to modify in the same case. The county’s SelfServe Center offers guidance and packets tailored to custody, visitation, and modifications. 

Required forms (new case vs. change to an existing order):

• New custody case: a verified Complaint for Child Custody (plus civil cover sheet and summons).
• Change to an existing order: a Motion to Modify Custody/Visitation explaining the substantial change since the last order. Mecklenburg provides local forms and instructions; these are county-specific and help self-represented parents get started. 

Where and how to file:

• Attorneys must file electronically through eCourts (File & Serve) in eCourts counties like Mecklenburg.
• Self-represented parents can file in person with the Clerk of Court and can get procedural help and packets from the SelfServe Center (they can’t give legal advice). 

Step 3: Serve the Other Parent

After you file your custody complaint or motion to modify in Mecklenburg County, you must properly serve the other parent with the documents under the North Carolina Rules of Civil Procedure. This is a critical step—if service isn’t done correctly, your case can be delayed or dismissed.

Accepted service methods include:

• Personal service by the county sheriff in the other parent’s county.
• Certified mail, return receipt requested, sent to the other parent’s home or place of business.
• Designated delivery service (e.g., FedEx) if it provides a signed receipt.
• In some cases, personal delivery by someone over 21 who is not a party to the case.

Response timeframe:

• In most cases, the other parent has 30 days from the date of service to file an answer (or other response).
• They can request a 30-day extension from the court, which is often granted.

Step 4: Attend Custody Mediation

In Mecklenburg County, parents are required to participate in the Custody Mediation Program before a custody trial can be scheduled. This program is designed to give parents a chance to create their own parenting plan—without the stress, expense, and unpredictability of trial.

How mediation works:

• After your case is filed, the court schedules a parent orientation session to explain the process.
• You’ll then attend mediation with a neutral, court-appointed mediator.
• The mediator’s role is to guide the discussion and help you focus on practical arrangements—not to decide the case or give legal advice.

Confidentiality:
Everything said in mediation is confidential and cannot be used later in court, except for the signed parenting agreement if you reach one. This allows parents to speak openly without worrying about how it might be used against them.

When mediation can be waived:
In some cases—such as where there’s a history of domestic violence, substance abuse, or extreme conflict—the court may waive mediation and move directly to a hearing. You must request this waiver and provide supporting evidence.

Crafting a Parenting Agreement:
If you and the other parent reach an agreement in mediation, the mediator will draft a Parenting Agreement that covers:

• Custody type (legal and physical)
• Weekly schedules and holiday schedules
• Decision-making processes
• Transportation and exchange details

Step 5: Prepare for the Custody Hearing (If Mediation Fails)

If custody mediation in Mecklenburg County does not result in an agreement, your case will proceed to a custody hearing before a district court judge. Preparation is key—this is your opportunity to present a clear, well-supported picture of why joint custody is in your child’s best interests.

Gathering persuasive evidence:

• School records showing attendance, grades, and involvement in school activities.
• Medical and therapy records documenting care and parental participation.
• Communication logs (texts, emails, or app records) that demonstrate cooperation or attempts to resolve issues.
• Witness statements from teachers, coaches, neighbors, or family who have observed your parenting.
• Proof of involvement in your child’s life—photos, activity sign-ups, receipts for supplies, travel records, and calendars of time spent together.

Demonstrating your ability to co-parent:

• Show that you can communicate respectfully about the child’s needs.
• Provide examples of times you’ve worked with the other parent to solve problems.
• Explain how you’ll support your child’s relationship with the other parent, even if you disagree.

Follow local court rules:
Mecklenburg County Family Court has specific rules for exhibit preparation, filing deadlines, and disclosures before trial. Missing these requirements can result in your evidence being excluded, so review the court’s local rules—or work with a family law attorney to make sure you’re in compliance.

Step 6: The Custody Hearing in Mecklenburg County

At the hearing, the judge’s role is to determine what custody arrangement serves the best interests of the child.

How the judge considers evidence:

• The court will review the documents, exhibits, and testimony you present.
• The judge may take judicial notice of prior court orders and hear from both parents and any relevant witnesses.

Key factors the court may weigh include:

• Stability: How well each home provides a consistent, safe environment.
• Parental involvement: Past and current caregiving roles, participation in school, medical appointments, and extracurricular activities.
• Child’s adjustment: How the child is doing at home, school, and in the community.
• Safety concerns: Any history of domestic violence, substance abuse, or unsafe living conditions.
• Ability to cooperate: Whether both parents can communicate and make joint decisions without constant conflict.

Possible outcomes:

• Joint legal custody (both parents share decision-making authority).
• Joint physical custody (both parents share time, not always 50/50).
• Hybrid arrangements where one parent has primary physical custody but legal custody is shared.
• In rare cases, sole custody to one parent if joint custody is not in the child’s best interests.

Take the Next Step: Speak with a Charlotte Custody Attorney

Joint custody in Mecklenburg County involves several key stages—from filing and proper service to mandatory mediation and, if needed, a hearing before a district court judge. Careful preparation, solid documentation, and clear communication can make all the difference. The right legal guidance helps you present a plan that truly serves your child’s best interests and fits your family’s real life.

If you are seeking joint custody in Mecklenburg County, contact The Goodman Law Firm, PLLC today.
Phone: (704) 502-6773
Email: kg@goodmanlawnc.com
Address: 10020 Monroe Road, Suite 170-288, Matthews, NC 28105
Website: www.goodmanlawnc.com

‍